yesterday:
i had 2 whole interactions with my dad. the first was presenting him with the options: sandwich, eggs, or pasta, to which he responded, "have you seen my rifle? i had it last night, can't find it anywhere, it's about 3 feet long." the second was when i slugged him in the arm and said, "that's for taking my boyfriend's side," to which he responded, "you were testing him," to which i responded, "bullshit." for the record, i was not testing him. tests are for pupils.
today:
i am single for good. i got the dump last night and didn't get 1 wink, cried on my dog, contracted a decent sized migraine, decided to go for a run at 4:45 in the morning, then went to nanny for my tinyfriend. again, she was mistaken to be my baby while we were playing at the park, and i was informed that she is the most beautiful girl in the world and that i am truly blessed. strangers say nice things with the expectation of affirmation, and tinyfriend is beautiful, so i said "thank you" and did a lie (!!! job-getting practice !!!) and pretended to be truly blessed (when in reality, i was a perfectly contained wreck fueled by caffeine and impeccable repression, rocking a toddler in a purple plastic car-on-a-spring while yelling "JUST LIKE A REAL CAR, JUST LIKE A REAL CAR!" ). i got home and chopped off my hair (silverback watched) and threw away things that made me cry and snuggled with silverback and stormfellow and told them that i simply love them and that i cherish their support. and then i booked my ticket to PA, flying in 17 days, to see my all-time maximum badass mentor (who i have not seen since 2009).
job interview tomorrow. i thought about it, and i'm not going to lie. i'm not even going to take my facial piercing out. take me or leave me unemployed.
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